


Free the Past, Comes the Spring

by momojuusu



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-05
Packaged: 2018-05-24 21:56:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6168121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momojuusu/pseuds/momojuusu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hyunwoo and Minhyuk buy a domestic robot (which later is named Kihyun by Minhyuk) and the manual says that if the robot smiles, that means its owner can be happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Free the Past, Comes the Spring

**Author's Note:**

  * For [centipatch](https://archiveofourown.org/users/centipatch/gifts).



> Based loosely (or not loosely, that is the question) on some manga I read back then when I was still a kid... LOL, kidding, I reread it just a month ago. I can’t find it online, so if you know Chim Chim Cherry!, this fic is based on the extra story on volume 3.
> 
> Also for Dilla and any other Showhyuk shippers on my Twitter, who wanted to read smutty Showhyuk. This is not mainly smut fic, but you can find in in the middle of the story. It’s not a good smut, I’m warning you before it's too late.
> 
> Vietnamese translation on [Wordpress](https://realsweetvoice.wordpress.com/2017/06/14/transfic-free-the-past-comes-the-spring/) | [Wattpad](https://www.wattpad.com/426025309-transfic-showhyuk-free-the-past-comes-the-spring)

“Ah, he opens his eyes, Hyunwoo!”

Minhyuk held his breath as the eyes of the domestic robot slowly opened. They just bought it, Hyunwoo and he, and it would be their first experience having a domestic robot. It was uncommon to have a ‘male’ domestic robot—“This will be the first and the last male domestic robot we’ve ever seen, don’t you think?” Minhyuk said after Hyunwoo pointed at it while he found the robot in the expo—but since it was the last item this trustworthy robot shop sold (and 50% off because the unusual gender), they brought it home, anyway.

“He doesn’t need to be charged,” Hyunwoo pushed his black-framed glasses as he read the manual, a cigarette resting at the corner of his lips. “His energy source is his owner’s happiness. If he smiles, that means we can be happy.”

“What a romantic person, whoever invented him,” Minhyuk mumbled, eyes locking on the robot’s figure still.

“I hope he won’t get hyped whenever he’s around you,” Hyunwoo closed the manual book and ruffled Minhyuk’s hair, earning soft whines from the younger. “There are many things we should update to his system. There’s a button on his nape, press it and you only need to say what function you want him to do. Good luck with it, Minhyuk.”

Minhyuk shot a glare at Hyunwoo. “Me? It’s me who has to add every function to his system?! What will you do, then?!”

“Working,” Hyunwoo answered shortly, exhaling smokes through his lips. “Don’t forget to bring my coffee to my room.”

Minhyuk huffed in annoyance as Hyunwoo disappeared behind the door. He then looked back to the domestic robot as he listed everything he should add to this new mate.

“Adding Son Hyunwoo and Lee Minhyuk as your masters,” he said, pressing the button on the robot’s nape to add the information. He then paused, expression showing that he was thinking of something. “Uh… I think you need a name.”

The robot tilted his head and Minhyuk couldn’t help but squeal because he was so cute.

“Let me think…” Minhyuk tapped his finger on his lips as he thought. “Kihyun. How about Kihyun? Do you like it?”

A smile appeared on the robot’s face.

“Yes, master.”

Minhyuk grinned. “Adding Kihyun as your name,” He patted Kihyun’s head. “Welcome to the family, Kihyun.”

 

+

 

“Kihyun, can you bring these toasts to Hyunwoo? He skipped his lunch again today; he needed something to fill his stomach aside of coffee.”

“Yes, master.”

Minhyuk looked carefully at Kihyun while the robot knocked Hyunwoo’s door and opened it once he got permission to enter. It had been a day since Kihyun arrived at their small, yet cozy flat, and so far the robot did everything well. Kihyun helped Minhyuk with chores a lot, and Minhyuk was happy that he shouldn’t pay attention of it as much as before.

Kihyun went back to the kitchen a moment after, bringing a dirty, empty cup that Hyunwoo used to drink his previous coffee. The robot smiled at Minhyuk, who was now sitting on the kitchen counter and watching him washing the dirty dishes.

“Hyunwoo’s novel deadline is getting near, thus he gets so busy nowadays. I have so many college tasks in my hands, too, and it was difficult to keep everything up before you came,” Minhyuk started again. “He’s so busy that I start missing him now.”

Kihyun moved his gaze to Minhyuk, a soft smile tugging his lips. It was like a teasing, knowing smile and it caused Minhyuk to blush.

“We’re not lovers, you know,” said the blond. “We’re what people call sex buddies. Our relationship is no more than something in bed.”

The robot looked at him, curiosity clearly shown in his eyes. “Is it not a good thing?”

Minhyuk looked down to his lap. It wasn’t a good thing, was it? But, it was the only thing that could put him in the closest distance to Hyunwoo, so he couldn’t say that it was a completely bad thing. “Maybe…” he answered hesitantly. “Sometimes it makes me sad, but I think I don’t mind it.”

Kihyun’s expression was unreadable, but Minhyuk could guess that the robot felt sorry for him.

“But, you know…” Minhyuk bit his lower lip, “I love him. It’s still unrequited, but who knows… right, Kihyun?”

Kihyun’s smile was always comforting; it triggered Minhyuk to smile as well.

“Yes, master.”

 

+

 

“Look, this is Hyunwoo’s previous book. Pretty cool, huh? The cover and all… I even got his signature on the front page!” Minhyuk showed a rather thick book to Kihyun proudly. “It’s so funny that people will run to get this signed book of the famous novelist Son Hyunwoo while I only need to drag my feet to his room and ask him to give me one for free!”

It was Saturday, but Hyunwoo was still busy with his soon-to-be-released novel. He headed out to meet his editor, leaving Minhyuk and Kihyun with a pile of chores they needed to take care of. They spent half of the day to wash the clothes, clean up the kitchen and the living room, throw the things they didn’t need anymore, and water two pots of flowers they had in the balcony. Usually Minhyuk would be all grumpy because he needed to do all this stuff alone, but since they had Kihyun now, he was happy that everything had been done before the sun set.

So, now there they were, lazing on the couch, Kihyun sat on the edge with Minhyuk resting his head on the robot’s lap—Minhyuk inserted the ‘pat Minhyuk’s head every time he rests his head on your lap’ function to Kihyun’s system, which made Hyunwoo sigh.

“You’re warm, Ki,” Minhyuk continued blabbering. “You’re not like any other domestic robots I’ve ever seen. You’re warm, just like a human. If I were your inventor, I would never sell you, you know. You’re too precious to be sold.”

Kihyun only smiled, hand never stopping stroking Minhyuk’s hair.

“I really wonder why they sold you… and half price because of your gender? Seriously, it’s not even fair! No one said that domestic robots should be female. It’s only an appearance, though. You work even better than the others! Well, on the other hand, it’s a good thing, because that way we could save the money for other important things.”

Minhyuk didn’t know how long he talked to Kihyun until drowsiness took over his body. He had fallen into deep slumber when the door cracked open and Hyunwoo entered the room.

He had fallen into deep slumber that he didn’t recognize that Hyunwoo carried him to his room and put the blanket up to his shoulder.

He had fallen into deep slumber that he didn’t hear it when Hyunwoo said, “He never shows his feelings to anyone, but sometimes I can catch loneliness in his eyes. Please, take care of him, Kihyun.”

 

+

 

Hyunwoo looked so awful when Minhyuk just got home from college. His dark hair stuck up into every direction and his glasses were thrown recklessly on the coffee table in front of the couch. It looked like the elder had just gotten up from his restless sleep to the point Minhyuk didn’t have the heart to let him be like that.

“Tired?” asked the younger as he threw his body over Hyunwoo’s, straddling his lap. “You look like you will die tomorrow.”

Hyunwoo sighed as he rested his head on the back of the couch, closing his tired eyes. “I just need more sleep,” he said, “and some relaxing time. These days have been too hectic.”

“Do you think I can give you a little _help_ to make you feel better?”

Hyunwoo opened his eyes and Minhyuk knew Hyunwoo knew what kind of _help_ he could give.

“You just got home,” said the novelist after a while. He sat Minhyuk to the spot next to him and pat the younger’s head before getting up to his feet and heading back to his room.

“So what if I just got home?” Minhyuk grinned as he followed Hyunwoo inside, closing the door and locking it. “I’m not an old man like you; I still have enough energy to do _everything_ you need.”

It didn’t take long until Minhyuk’s body was pushed onto the bed with Hyunwoo arms caging beside his head.

“Naughty boy,” Hyunwoo whispered as he bent down to kiss Minhyuk’s jaw. “You’re really testing me, you know.”

“You said you need it,” Minhyuk smiled, but it wasn’t the smile everyone could see—it was the smile _only_ Hyunwoo could see every time they did their _business_ , _“relaxing.”_

“Relaxing,” The elder’s thick lips roamed against Minhyuk’s neck, teeth grazing the milky skin, leaving purplish marks that would make Minhyuk wear a turtle neck shirt for a few days. “Yeah, it’s been a while.”

“You’ve been so busy lately that you forgot you still have my ass for your entertainment,” Soft gasps escaped from Minhyuk’s lips as Hyunwoo sucked the small spot behind his ear—his weakness. “… But it seems you still remember how to make me surrender.”

Hyunwoo didn’t answer and kept sucking the spot instead, making Minhyuk curl his toes as the pleasure started building inside him. Hyunwoo was so quiet while doing his _job,_ but Minhyuk didn’t mind it. He missed Hyunwoo’s touches; the big hands that caressed every inch of his skin, the mouth that sucked him here and there, and the teeth that painted his body with marks.

One by one they took every layer of their clothes, throwing them to floor, letting them scatter carelessly. Hyunwoo’s tan skin felt like burning on Minhyuk’s pale one; the younger threw his head back when Hyunwoo rubbed his hard length against his, and Hyunwoo used that chance to suck on Minhyuk’s Adam’s apple.

Despite his usual noisy demeanor, Minhyuk was calmer in bed. Once Hyunwoo laid his hands on Minhyuk’s body, it was like the blond lost his strength… which he knew that Hyunwoo liked it. Hyunwoo liked it when Minhyuk submitted to him; he loved every soft noise Minhyuk made in every friction and Minhyuk knew it at its best.

Minhyuk knew his weak moans would turn Hyunwoo on even more; it could be proved from how Hyunwoo got harder when delicate whimpers echoed at every corner of the room. Minhyuk could see the older male gritting his teeth as he impatiently grabbed the bottle of lube from the drawer next to the bed and poured the transparent liquid onto his fingers, ready to prepare Minhyuk.

“Ahh,” Minhyuk squirmed when a finger was pushed inside him. His hands were on Hyunwoo’s shoulders, gripping them tightly. He shuddered when Hyunwoo thrust his long, thick digit; it was slow and gentle in the beginning, but getting rapidly after Hyunwoo added two more fingers.

Hyunwoo’s fingers worked like magic. _Hyunwoo_ worked like magic. Minhyuk loved how Hyunwoo knew where to touch, where to scratch, where to tease. Hyunwoo knew how to hook his fingers; he knew in what way Minhyuk wanted to be touched. It was like Minhyuk’s body wasn’t a puzzle anymore; Hyunwoo memorized it as well as he remembered his own body.

Minhyuk let out whiny sighs when Hyunwoo pulled out his fingers. He wanted more—he _needed_ more. For a second or two, he forgot that he was the one who wanted to pleasure Hyunwoo, but it turned to be Hyunwoo doing all the works for him. Minhyuk watched in anticipation when Hyunwoo smeared the cold liquid onto his arousal, gulping as the taller finally aligned it upon him.

It was when Hyunwoo pushed his length in one go when Minhyuk’s breath hitched. His back arched beautifully as Hyunwoo buried himself deeply inside; he could feel how his hole squeezed the thick rod tightly. Tears brimmed in Minhyuk’s eyes because the pain started spreading on his spine, but he didn’t make any protests. Meanwhile, Hyunwoo bent down, lips capturing Minhyuk’s perky nipple, licking it to distract the latter from the pain he currently had. Minhyuk could feel Hyunwoo smiling while sucking his hard nub when he heard Minhyuk’s needy cries.

“M-Move,” the blond male said after he adjusted with Hyunwoo’s size. He closed his eyes tightly as Hyunwoo started pounding into him; the pain had gone and the sinfully pleasure came back, taking over his body.

More moans filled the air in every thrust Hyunwoo gave to Minhyuk. The older male penetrated into him like a beast, but the arms that held his slender waist made him feel safe.

_Yet, he doesn’t have the love left for me._

Minhyuk moved his eyes up to Hyunwoo’s, hands stretching, searching for Hyunwoo’s cheeks. “Look at me,” he said under his shaky breath. Cupping Hyunwoo’s face, he brought it closer, even though he knew he wouldn’t find what he wanted in those dark orbs of Hyunwoo’s.

Maybe it was a habit or it was just Minhyuk, who never got tired to hurt himself, but in their two years of relationship, he was never absent to ask Hyunwoo to look right into his eyes during their sex. He enjoyed having Hyunwoo’s sharp gaze upon him, but above all, it had been two years that Minhyuk never stopped looking for a little bit of hope in Hyunwoo’s eyes.

He never found it, though.

The sounds of skins slapping got more intense as they slowly but sure climbed to the highest peak of pleasure. Hyunwoo groaned and broke their eye contact before giving Minhyuk the last thrust right against the younger’s bundle of nerve and filling the latter’s hole with his seeds, bringing Minhyuk to see stars without needing to stroke his leaking member.

They both were panting heavily after that. Minhyuk laid his back still on the mattress, wincing at the stinging pain on the lower parts of his body. Hyunwoo, on the other hand, had worn his boxer back; he took a pack of cigarettes and pulled one of it out, lighting it up.

His face looked fresher, yet Minhyuk’s, ironically, wasn’t better than a zombie’s. Hyunwoo seemed to notice it. Huffing white smokes from his mouth, he stroked the younger’s blonde strands and bent down to peck Minhyuk on the corner of his lips.

No, kissing each other on their mouths was not allowed because they weren’t lovers.

Though, Minhyuk still believed it was because Hyunwoo wasn’t ready for having someone’s lips against his.

“You didn’t have to force yourself, you know,” said the novelist as he leaned against the headboard. “Now you’re the one who look like you’ll die in a minute.”

Minhyuk chuckled at that. “Nah, I’m fine,” he said, extreme tiredness clearly heard in his voice. “You’ve felt better, after all.”

A frown came across Hyunwoo’s face. “So selfless.”

Sitting up, Minhyuk took Hyunwoo’s cigarette and deeply inhaled on it—he wasn’t a big fan of cigars, but in _special occasion,_ smoking would make him feel better. “But, it’s my job to keep you safe and sound,” he continued with a smile—it was the smile that Hyunwoo hated and he knew it, but he still let it appear. “It’s all what _he_ asked me to do.”

Minhyuk knew Hyunwoo’s eyes never left him since he got off of the bed and put back his clothes, until he finally walked out of the room.

Outside, he found Kihyun staring at him. The robot seemed to have just finished cooking lunch for Hyunwoo and him, and maybe the sounds of the door open and close distracted him…

… Or not.

Maybe Kihyun just simply knew what happened between Minhyuk and Hyunwoo; maybe Kihyun could just simply see the pain in Minhyuk’s eyes.

A wide grin cracked on Minhyuk’s face, Hyunwoo’s cig still tucked in the corner of his lips. He approached Kihyun and wrapped his arms around the robot’s small waist.

“Aaah, Kihyun, it huuurts a lot~!”

 

+

 

_“I’m sorry that I took him from you.”_

It had been two years, but Minhyuk could never forget it; the heavy atmosphere, the sickening smell of hospital, Hyunwoo’s depressed face, and _him._ Minhyuk would never forget about _him,_ whose name was forbidden to be said.

_He_ was Hyunwoo’s first love. _He_ was Hyunwoo’s everything. They were inseparable. They were two who were meant to be together. Hyunwoo loved _him_ more than anything. Hyunwoo treasured _him_ like he was a rare jewel, which couldn’t be found anywhere. Hyunwoo was deeply in love, so was _him_.

So was Minhyuk.

They were friends in college. Minhyuk met _him_ first because they were both freshmen that time. They were close, so close that Minhyuk felt like having a brother who would always take care of him and whom he would take care of. _He_ had a weak heart, so Minhyuk was always extra careful about his health and all. Minhyuk always reminded him to drink the medicines, so he wouldn’t collaps.

He had a weak heart, thus Minhyuk always did what he said, including letting go of Hyunwoo.

They were quite close, Minhyuk and Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo was his senior in the college radio that Minhyuk joined, and they seemed to have the similar taste of music, that was why Minhyuk often brought him home to show him his old CD collection (CD, because Minhyuk loved vintage stuff). They were quite close that Minhyuk found himself attracted to Hyunwoo.

Minhyuk and Hyunwoo were two who were like the north and the south. They were completely different—Hyunwoo was as cold and gloomy as foggy forest, meanwhile Minhyuk was so warm and bright like the sun in spring. Hyunwoo was quiet while Minhyuk was the mood maker among all his friends.

It was opposite attraction; Minhyuk believed he attracted to Hyunwoo because they balanced each other. They were like two magnetic fields that kept pulling on each other, and Minhyuk finally realized that he had fallen in love with Hyunwoo.

Minhyuk was deeply in love with Hyunwoo’s voice, Hyunwoo’s eyes, Hyunwoo’s lips—Hyunwoo’s bad and good shit. Minhyuk was deeply in love with Hyunwoo’s everything.

Even _he_ knew it, but there were always those people who let themselves go blind because of their uncontrollably feelings toward someone they loved. _He_ was one of those people.

Minhyuk couldn’t even be mad when _he_ said he was in love with Hyunwoo as well. Minhyuk couldn’t prevent _him_ from dating Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo liked _him_ back, anyway, so even though Minhyuk tried his very best to be with Hyunwoo, it would all be useless.

Thus, Minhyuk let go. Thus, Minhyuk willingly broke his own heart into pieces.

It hurt, but Minhyuk loved _him_ like he loved his own brother, and Minhyuk didn’t want to let him down. Minhyuk never let him down and he didn’t want to dirty his record.

But, still, it hurt. It hurt to accept the reality that Hyunwoo didn’t think of them as two magnet fields that kept pulling on each other. Hyunwoo didn’t attract to their opposite behaviors. Hyunwoo did attract to _his_ calmness, to the pure and innocent features he had. Minhyuk was nothing. Minhyuk wasn’t even visible when Hyunwoo was with _him._

A year had passed since then. Although the pain still stung in his heart, Minhyuk had managed to pull himself together. He had managed to give both Hyunwoo and _him_ his usual bright and genuine smile. He thought he would move on soon. He was sure that everything would be alright from now on.

But, life was cruel. Life played with his heart once again, when _he_ collapsed for the last time.

It was a freezing afternoon when Minhyuk forced his legs to run faster down the chilly street. He bumped into many people, but he didn’t care. What he cared was how to get to the hospital as soon as possible and make sure that everything was under control, that _he_ would be just fine.

He had just finished his class when his phone buzzed in his pants pocket. It was Hyunwoo. It was Hyunwoo, who cried, telling him to go to the hospital because he didn’t know what to do anymore. _He_  fell down all of a sudden when they were on a date and, oh, Minhyuk didn’t even listen to Hyunwoo anymore because he quickly ran. The traffic was packed because of the snow, thus he kept running.

Minhyuk hated running, but he was willing to run in a freezing afternoon to make sure that his life wouldn’t be any more miserable than this—not when he thought he would be happy; not when he was sure that everyone would finally get a happy ending.

But, life was cruel.

It was a snowy night when Minhyuk last talked to _him._ Hyunwoo was outside because _he_ wanted to talk privately to Minhyuk. It was a snowy night when Minhyuk’s heart broke for the umpteenth time because of _him._

“I know you’re still in love with him. I know you never stop loving him. Even though you never told me, from the beginning I’ve known that you’re in love with Hyunwoo. I was so selfish, Minhyukkie, for not letting you be with him. I was so selfish that I took him from you. I’m sorry that I took him from you…”

Minhyuk remembered he didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say. He wanted to be mad, he wanted to scream at how selfish _he_ was, but he couldn’t—not when _he_ was in this state, not when _he_ was standing between life and death.

“Please take care of him, Minhyukkie. I can’t be with him any longer… it might sound so selfish of me, but please keep him happy, keep him safe and sound.”

It was a week before _he_ was gone, a month before Minhyuk moved to Hyunwoo’s apartment, to make sure that Hyunwoo wouldn’t do anything that would harm his own self, and three months before Minhyuk be Hyunwoo’s fuck buddy.

Two years had passed, and the pain still stung in Minhyuk’s heart.

 

+

 

Hyunwoo reached his sharing apartment after midnight. His book had been released today and he decided to have a small party with everyone who had helped him. He forgot to tell Minhyuk about it, though, and now he felt rather guilty. His phone was dead also; he was 100% sure that Minhyuk would be mad because he had made the younger worry much.

The sounds from the TV was heard when he stepped into the living room. The first thing he saw was Kihyun; the robot turned his head as he came closer. A small smile came across Hyunwoo’s tired face when he found Minhyuk sleeping with his head on Kihyun’s lap—Hyunwoo had told Kihyun to carry Minhyuk if he fell asleep, but this time Hyunwoo was certain that Minhyuk insisted to wait until Hyunwoo arrived at home, yet falling asleep before Hyunwoo came.

“Welcome home, master,” Kihyun greeted him as Hyunwoo crouched down in front of Minhyuk and him. “Tiring day?”

“Sort of,” Hyunwoo answered, hand caressing Minhyuk’s cheek. “He’s been asleep for a long time?”

Kihyun nodded. “Master was tired, but he wanted to wait for you.”

Hyunwoo chuckled—so he was right.

Putting his bag on the coffee table, Hyunwoo then carried Minhyuk’s body effortlessly. He frowned that he felt Minhyuk getting lighter than he remembered. He noticed that the younger got thinner, too, and it made him slightly worry. Minhyuk was in his last year of college. He would graduate soon, thus he spent most of his time on his thesis. Minhyuk might take care of him well, but he knew that Minhyuk barely paid attention to his own health, and sometimes it worried even more.

Soft whines came from Minhyuk’s throat when Hyunwoo laid him down the bed. Hyunwoo covered the thin body with the blanket before sitting on the edge of the bed, watching Minhyuk snuggling comfortably onto his pillow. He stroked the soft hair gently, keeping on doing that for a while. Minhyuk’s sleeping face was so peaceful, but there were times when Hyunwoo could see a shadow of sadness and tiredness on it.

“Did he eat his dinner?” Hyunwoo asked Kihyun, who was now standing at the door, just in case his master needed something.

“Yes, master.”

Hyunwoo only hummed in return. Bending down, he pressed a kiss on Minhyuk’s temple before getting up and walking outside. He went to the balcony, wanting to smoke before he went to sleep, and Kihyun tailed him, again, just in case his master needed something.

It was when Hyunwoo realized that there was something different in Kihyun.

There were four bars that indicated Kihyun’s battery on the robot’s neck. It used to be full, but tonight Hyunwoo recognized that there were three bars left.

“You live from our happiness,” Hyunwoo mumbled. He reached for Kihyun’s neck, running his thumb along the bar on the robot’s neck. “Happiness, huh…”

Kihyun didn’t say anything, but his eyes never left Hyunwoo.

 

+

 

“How could you forget to bring your wallet?! You’re going to another town, what if something happened and you would need your cards or everything in your wallet?! How could you be so reckless like this, Hyunwoo?!”

Minhyuk strutted into Hyunwoo’s room with his phone pressing against his ear. He could hear Hyunwoo sighing in the other side as he moved his eyes to find a black wallet Hyunwoo usually brought anywhere. Hyunwoo was on his way to the airport; he would go to another town for a book signing event. His book had become a bestseller within a week that Hyunwoo got so busy with book signing and meet and greet events (that made Minhyuk kind of lonely because he missed Hyunwoo so much, even Kihyun couldn’t comfort him).

_“Can you bring it to me within an hour? I’ll be waiting in front of the terminal.”_

“I can’t even find it!” Minhyuk whined. He went to Hyunwoo’s desk, trying to find the wallet among the pile of books and papers. “God, you need to clean up your desk after this.”

_“If it’s not on my desk, then it’s inside my coat I used yesterday,”_ Hyunwoo said. _“I have to go for a while, Minhyuk, call me back if you’re in the airport already.”_

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” the younger muttered, still focused on searching Hyunwoo’s wallet. He threw his phone to Hyunwoo’s bed after the call was ended, and continued looking for it carefully, not wanting to mess Hyunwoo’s works on the desk.

Not finding it on the messy desk, Minhyuk then took the said coat that was hung behind the door, fishing the left pocket. It wasn’t there, so he fished another pocket. He smiled widely as his fingers touched the leathery thing that he believed was Hyunwoo’s wallet. He quickly pulled it off, but something metallic was pulled as well along with the wallet and did drop to the floor.

It was a tiny, round-shaped thing, and it made Minhyuk almost lost his grip on Hyunwoo’s wallet.

Minhyuk crouched down, hand shaking when he took the small thing. He sure knew what it was. He had seen that thing a thousand times back then. It was Hyunwoo’s most precious thing before he decided to throw every single thing related to his deceased lover away two years ago.

It was a hologram projector. If Minhyuk pressed the small button on its side, he knew he wouldn’t take it anymore. If he pressed the small button on its side, he knew he would break down, not able to keep himself together.

But, he still pressed it. He still let a figure appeared, someone he loved the most, yet at the same time, he hated the most.

It was a hologram of _him._ Minhyuk never forgot how _he_ smiled and laughed, and how gentle he was. Minhyuk never forgot, but now everything came back; the door to his forbidden memory had opened once again.

Everything had come back along with a sudden realization of how similar _he_ and Kihyun were.

It was like a wave crashing his thin body. Kihyun was gentle. Kihyun’s smile wasn’t so bright, but it was the warmest Minhyuk had ever seen… just like _his._ Their faces might be different, but Minhyuk only had to look in different angle to see that there was something that made them look alike.

_Hyunwoo must see it from the beginning, because he never forgets._

“That’s why you chose Kihyun, because you don’t want to forget.”

Minhyuk broke into laughter. He knew he should’ve cried loudly, cursing _him,_ cursing Hyunwoo, cursing his life, but he couldn’t. He kept laughing and laughing, laughing at his stupidity, at how fate could toy him this way.

“Master…?”

It was Kihyun’s voice that stopped him. He looked up, only to meet Kihyun’s concerned eyes.

Did he hate Kihyun now? Did he hate Kihyun because the robot reminded Hyunwoo of _him?_

The answer was no. Minhyuk felt like laughing more at his selflessness, but he still had to go to the airport and gave the wallet to Hyunwoo.

“I’m going to the airport, Ki; Hyunwoo left his wallet, that old man,” Minhyuk said in his usual cheerful tone as he got up and went to his room to take his coat. “Don’t open the door for a stranger, okay? I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

Grabbing Hyunwoo’s car keys, he left their sharing apartment.

Minhyuk didn’t seem to notice that one more green-colored bar on Kihyun’s neck went off, leaving two orange bars blinking.

 

+

 

The only one that left on Kihyun’s neck when Hyunwoo got home was a single red bar.

Hyunwoo finally finished his meet and greet event for this month, and what he wanted was to come home and have a luxury of lazing his ass around (and maybe have a _private_ time with Minhyuk, rewarding the latter for crazily driving to the airport for the sake of his wallet).

What he didn’t expect was the atmosphere in his apartment wasn’t good at all.

Kihyun sat on the couch, looking all weak and powerless. Soft beeping sounds could be heard as well, sharing the same rhyme with the blinking red light. Hyunwoo took a short breath before rushing to the robot, checking the condition.

“What’s going on?” the novelist asked rather worriedly. It didn’t feel nice at all to see the usually gentle eyes of Kihyun now were dimmed, as though Kihyun was about the shut down in no time.

“Master Lee is very sad,” Kihyun answered with a weak voice. “Master Lee isn’t happy.”

Minhyuk was sad? Hyunwoo didn’t understand. Minhyuk looked furious because of his recklessness the last Hyunwoo met him two days ago, but he didn’t find anything in the younger’s eyes aside of his worries and slight of relief that he could bring the wallet in time to Hyunwoo.

Before Hyunwoo’s brain could proceed to anything more, the truth hit him hard.

All this time, it was never about him. He kept the thought that Kihyun slowly losing his energy was because of him, because he still took a tight grip of his past about _the one_ he loved the most, but, apparently, he was wrong.

It was never about him. His mourning wasn’t the greater; it wasn’t the reason behind everything happened to Kihyun.

It was Minhyuk’s sadness.

“Where’s he?” Hyunwoo muttered the question as he got up. Kihyun didn’t answer verbally, but the robot gazing at the door to his room was enough to show him where Minhyuk was now.

Hyunwoo didn’t know why he held his breath when he opened the door warily. He didn’t say anything, even though his eyes quickly caught a lonely figure standing before the windows glass. The sunshine beamed through the open curtain, making Minhyuk look even angelic… and lonelier.

_How much time has passed since we live together that I’m getting used to seeing your lonely back, and starting to think that it doesn’t mean anything?_

Hyunwoo needed to get closer to see that Minhyuk was holding something in his hand. The thin fingers of his toyed with it, but his eyes were looking at nowhere. Hyunwoo could guess that Minhyuk was lost in his own mind that the latter didn’t even realize his presence.

“One more minute you let your sadness take over your mind, Kihyun’s system will be forced to shut down.”

Minhyuk looked startled when Hyunwoo spoke. He turned his body around, face as pale as the white walls around them. “H-Hyunwoo,” he stuttered, “You’re home.”

Hyunwoo’s eyes stabbed Minhyuk’s in a sharp gaze as he walked even closer, arm stretched to take the thing in Minhyuk’s hand. “I kept thinking that I was the reason of why Kihyun’s battery drained,” he continued, now eyeing the small hologram projector, “but then I realized it wasn’t me.”

Minhyuk tugged his lips into a forceful smile. “I don’t get it,” His voice was merely a weak whisper that was barely heard. “I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”

Suddenly, Hyunwoo felt so sick of it. Memories filled his mind like a great wave and it made him sore. The memories of the three of them hanging out together and the moment when he caught Minhyuk staring longingly—secretly—at him; the memories of _his_ apologetic look whenever Minhyuk was around, everything crushed him mercilessly, pushing him to the edge of patience.

_Why did you keep quiet about it after all this time? How could you manage to stay all bright when your feelings for me only bring you sadness?_

“It’s because of me, right, Minhyuk?” He knew that pulling the truth to the surface would hurt the younger even more, but he needed to make sure of it; he needed to fix everything between them before he lost everything. “It’s because I was with _him,_ right? It’s because I _am_ still in love with _him,_ even until now, isn’t it?”

Pain was shown as clear as daylight in Minhyuk’s face that it was impossible for Hyunwoo not to notice it. The blond didn’t say anything; instead, he tried to walk past Hyunwoo. He didn’t want to talk about it, Hyunwoo was sure, but he had to— _they_ had to.

“You’re not going anywhere,” Hyunwoo’s grip was like an iron around Minhyuk’s wrist. He held it tightly, even tighter when Minhyuk tried to get off of him. “Minhyuk, you’re not going anywhere before we finish this conversation.”

“This conversation is not needed, Hyunwoo,” Minhyuk’s voice had gone back to its usual, as steady as ever, as though there was nothing wrong with him, with _them._ Hyunwoo would gladly give him a standing applause for his ability to get a grip of himself as soon as possible, even when he was in shocked.

It wasn’t a good thing, though; Hyunwoo hated to see how calm Minhyuk faced him, the main reason of his heartbroken.

Hyunwoo had never known that seeing Minhyuk in the state he was now was this painful. He had never had an idea that seeing how small and broken Minhyuk was would bring sorrow as great as this. He was so selfish, enjoying the treatment Minhyuk gave to him without even once thinking of how the latter felt—he was too busy mourning his past scar that he didn’t realize that he carved new, fresh wounds into Minhyuk’s heart every time.

“I…” Hyunwoo loosened the grip around Minhyuk’s wrist, “… am sorry. I really am. I… I never knew. I never cared enough about you.”

Minhyuk shrugged. “It’s not your job to care about me,” he responded, trying to look nonchalant, but Hyunwoo knew there was a storm inside his mind. “It is my job to take care of you. It’s _his_ last wish.”

It wasn’t something special, Minhyuk said it a thousand times, but now it triggered Hyunwoo’s anger to rise. He hated it when Minhyuk started hiding behind ‘ _his_ last wish’. Usually, it would make Hyunwoo zip his mouth up, not saying anything else, but Hyunwoo didn’t want to let it slide anymore.

“Stop using it as your shield, Minhyuk,” Hyunwoo tried his very best to keep the control of his feelings. “Stop thinking that it’s a cage of your feelings. He didn’t ask you that to pin your freedom down.”

“I know,” Minhyuk moved his gaze down to his feet, “but it’s the only thing that can keep me close to you.”

That was it. A sentence was enough to express anything that had been hidden.

Hyunwoo’s heart sank when he felt how small and fragile Minhyuk in his arms.

 

+

 

Minhyuk wanted to cry, but he couldn’t. It was surprising, judging from how crybaby he usually was. He didn’t say anything when Hyunwoo pulled him into a hug; he didn’t embrace Hyunwoo back, but he didn’t try to free himself from the elder, too. He just stayed there, in the warmth that he always craved for.

He had lost his hope. When Hyunwoo said that he was still in love with _him,_ he immediately lost his grip of the last chance that he thought did exist. He felt so pathetic for hanging on the false hope that he made himself, even though deep inside he knew there was no such thing as a chance.

He felt stupid. He was embarrassed of himself. Now that Hyunwoo could read him like an open book, he felt insecure. The wall that hid his feelings was broken and now he was unshielded. He didn’t know what to do. Hyunwoo might not want to see his face anymore.

“It’s hard to let go, Minhyuk,” Hyunwoo’s voice broke his train of thoughts. “It’s hard to accept the truth that he was gone two years ago. It’s hard not to love him.”

Minhyuk kept quiet. How to respond to Hyunwoo in this situation, anyway? Every word from him would only make the situation worse. Thus, he chose to close his eyes and listen to what Hyunwoo would say.

“I still can’t believe that he died. He told me that he wouldn’t let his illness take over his body, but in the end, he’s the one lost the battle. I was… that day I felt betrayed,” Hyunwoo sighed and Minhyuk could feel that the arms around him tightening. “I was angry, too angry at him that I let you move with me, making you my… fuck buddy, friend with benefit, you name it. I just wanted to forget him.”

_But, you can’t. Even until now you’re still looking for his presence in my eyes—even in Kihyun’s eyes, despite the fact that he’s not a human._

“But, I can’t.”

_Told you so._

There was a push that separated Minhyuk from Hyunwoo’s warmth. A second later, Hyunwoo’s dark orbs crashed against his and for a moment, Minhyuk thought that Hyunwoo was looking for something besides _him_ in his eyes.

“But, I need a second chance. You need a second chance. _We_ need a new life to be gone through… together.”

Minhyuk fixated his gaze on Hyunwoo. What Hyunwoo just said was too dreamlike that he couldn’t believe it. The words seemed so strange that his ears weren’t familiar with them. “What…?” he whispered in disbelief.

Then he felt Hyunwoo’s fingers on his cheek; they were warm, so warm, or maybe too warm that Minhyuk couldn’t hold himself anymore.

“I need more time,” Hyunwoo continued, “I need to fix myself first before we start over. For that, I need you to wait.”

A single tear rolled down Minhyuk’s cheek, followed with another one, and another one, and another one, until they made two streams on the pale skin. It didn’t take long until sniffles turned into sobs, before it turned into desperate cries.

Minhyuk didn’t even realize that it was all coming from him.

Once again, he was stuck in Hyunwoo’s arms, but this time, he hugged the latter back. His slender fingers took tight grips on the back on Hyunwoo’s sweater while he buried his face into the joint where Hyunwoo’s neck and shoulder met, crying uncontrollably there.

Funny enough, the tears washed away the pain.

“You should’ve done this sooner,” Hyunwoo said after Minhyuk got calmer.

“Done what, crying?” Minhyuk shifted closer when Hyunwoo stroked his blonde hair.

“Letting your feelings take over your stupid mind,” A soft kiss landed on the crown of Minhyuk’s head. “Ah, Minhyuk, see.”

Minhyuk let go of Hyunwoo, only to turn to the direction where Hyunwoo’s index finger pointed at.

Despite his wet, red face, a wide smile appeared when he saw Kihyun standing before the door, holding a tray with, Minhyuk was sure, a cup of coffee for Hyunwoo and a mug of hot chocolate for him on it.

Kihyun was smiling. “Tea time,” the robot said.

“Why do you keep calling it tea time when none of us drinking tea here?” Minhyuk laughed; his voice was still hoarse from crying, but the laughter was genuine.

_When Kihyun smiles, that means we can be happy._

He threw a look at Hyunwoo, who had a soft smile on his face. He laughed more when Hyunwoo ruffled his head before taking his daily dose of coffee.

_We can be happy._

 

+

 

“Fuck, I’m late!”

“Language, Minhyuk. I don’t want Kihyun to say that word. It’s more than enough to hear him saying ‘your cock is big’ last week.”

“I told you not to upgrade him, now he has so many favorite dirty words in his system,” Minhyuk rolled his eyes—Hyunwoo decided to update all the programs in Kihyun, so they didn’t need to insert a function in his system anymore; Kihyun now had this ability to filter and learn everything on his own, including bad words that he heard somewhere.

“It’s been two years, Minhyuk, he _needed_ to be upgraded,” Hyunwoo kept with his opinion. “I still don’t understand why he keeps those words, though. I thought he had the filter function for this kind of thing…”

Minhyuk couldn’t say that he was the one who ‘taught’ Kihyun to use those words… just for fun.

“Well, I need to go. The hellish meeting is within an hour,” Minhyuk quickly said, trying to distract Hyunwoo from the Kihyun-and-his-favorite-dirty-words problem. “See y’all later, folks!”

It was when he was about to reach the doorknob when Hyunwoo pulled him to a quick kiss on his lips—the first kiss on the lips in the four years of their relationship.

Hyunwoo left right after he ended the kiss; he disappeared in his room, but Minhyuk could see how red his ears were.

Kihyun, who was bringing car keys in his hand, smiled at him.

“He was blushing, wasn’t he?” Minhyuk took the keys. “You saw it, right, Ki? He was blushing.”

“Yes, master.”

Minhyuk chewed his lower lip, thinking. “Doesn’t that mean I don’t need to wait longer anymore? Don’t you think so?”

Kihyun didn’t say anything, but the smile never left his gentle face.

“Uh, I have no time to think about it now,” Minhyuk said, yet he had no ability to prevent a grin from tugging his lips. “I’ll get going, Ki! Don’t forget to lock the door, and remind Hyunwoo to eat. I’ll see you tonight!”

“Have a nice day, master. Come back safely.”

The sun was shining bright outside, making Minhyuk feel even more energetic.

_If Kihyun smiles, that means we can be happy._

He exhaled softly when his car blended with the others, ready to meet the morning traffic.

_We are happy now._


End file.
